Oasis

[The Joker]

((Set after Triggers))

The cough had worsened and Joker was certain he was running a high grade fever. Cold shakes wracked his thin frame even while sweat formed on his brow. This wasn't how things were supposed to be. He shouldn't have opened up to Harvey/Two-Face and shouldn't be sick. It wasn't right.

Still, he somehow found himself standing in front of the door to Harvey's apartment. Hating himself, he pushed the door open and walked into the living room. He sighed in relief and collapsed onto the couch.

[Harvey Dent/Two-Face]

Harvey blinked a couple of times, his damaged eye feeling more dry and irritated than normal. He decided to take a coffee break away from the computer for a while. He picked up his coffee mug and made his way to the kitchen to refill it. The sight of the open door made him freeze.

He cursed silently as he realised his gun was back in the study - but then why would he carry a gun on a Sunday afternoon in his own home? Ther ws no weapon within arm's reach, so he picked up a piece of Japanese sculpture that Suzume hd brought him, silently apologising to her that he was going to have to use it to smash the intruder's skull open.

He stepped forwards as quietly as he could, raising the statuette. He sighed testily when he recognised the green hair and smears of makeup on the painted face.

"Joker."

[The Joker]

"Knock knock." Joker said weakly, turning his head to look at Harvey. He frowned. "Were you going to bludgeon me to death? That's really no way to treat a houseguest, Harvey. I'm cold and my chest hurts and my head feels funny. Be nice to me."

He rolled off of the couch and landed on his knees. Joker sat back on his heels and peered up at Harvey, lower lip sticking out slightly. "Can I stay with you for a few days? Pretty please with Sugar and Spice and Tartlette on top? I won't be any trouble, cross my heart and hope...well, not that I die, but you get it. All I need is some food and maybe a bath...I also probably need some clothes since these smell like someone died in them, which isn't true! Someone just died against them."

He shuffled forward and grabbed onto the hem of Harvey's shirt. "Please?"

[Harvey Dent/Two-Face]

Harvey set down the statuette. "Yes, I was. I still might." He sighed again. "I'm not surprised. You look terrible, Joker."

He looked down helplesly. "Ok, ok. You can stay, though Ollie will probably kill both us for this. Now get up before Two-Face gets any ideas. "

He pulled Joker's arm, drawing him onto the sofa.

[The Joker]

Joker allowed himself to be pulled up onto the sofa and pressed himself firmly against Harvey. He hunched over as he began to cough violently, hardly noticing the red flecks that appeared on his gloved hand.

After a long moment he cleared his throat and wiped his mouth with his sleeve. "Well that's unfortunate."

Joker leaned his fevered head on Harvey's shoulder. "Make me stop coughing, Harv. I can't blow things up if I'm coughing. And what would Bats think? He'd be so disappointed if he found out his favorite criminal had Tuberculosis and was going to die without his input. This is just depressing. I hate things that are depressing."

[Harvey Dent/Two-Face]

Harvey's eyes narrowed as he saw a smear of blood against the purple leather of Joker's gloves. "How long have you been coughing up blood, Joker?" he demanded.

He looked again at the pale skin under the smeared makeup."I think you're right, it could be tuberculosis. I'll get a doctor over. I know you probably don't have insurance, but don't worry, he's a mob guy. Most of his work is sewing things up and chopping bits off."

Harvey frowned. "You're not going to die. But yeah, it's depressing. So to cheer yourself up, I think you need a bath and a change of clothes. Everything I've got will swamp you but I'll see what I can do."

He wondered exactly what he was doing, allowing Joker to stay in his home. If Ollie and Two-Face's feelings weren't enough to consider, who was to say Joker wouldn't decide to try and stab him whilst he slept? He made a mental note to fit a lock on his bedroom door.

[The Joker]

Joker peered curiously at his gloves. "Oh, I dunno, a couple of days maybe. Is that bad?"

He rose unsteadily to his feet and started wandering off. "Where can I take a bath? That sounds like an excellent idea. Was it yours or mine? Can it have bubbles? Bubbles make everything better. One time when I was a kid I had a bubble bath I think, but dad got mad. Apparently bubbles were for girls. The side of the tub isn't a fun place to have your head hit."

He stopped a few feet away from the couch, swaying ever so slightly. "I don't need a doctor. I'm fine."

[Harvey Dent/Two-Face]

Harvey frowned again. "Yes, Joker, it is." He spoke as patiently as he could. "I normally only see that kind of thing when someone has a bullet lodged in their chest wall. So I'd say it's pretty damn bad."

He watched, concern rising as Joker began to make his way unsteadily out of the room. He should hate Joker, or at least tell him to leave the apartment immediately. But he couldn't. The man was still so much like a child, never more so than when he was lonely or ill. He remembered all the nights in Arkham that Joker had come to him for comfort or reassurance back before the clown's madness had overtaken him... back when he had sung all night and spent hours with his colouring books and begged for bedtime stories.

Harvey looked up sharply as Joker spoke about his father. For an instant he remembered his own childhood and blood running from a cut on his forehead when his father had smashed his head against a door before laying into him with both his fists and his belt; and how he had spent so long on Monday morning trying to comb his hair over the wound so that nobody at school would notice.

"I couldn't agree more," he said quietly. He met Joker's exhausted gaze. "Because I know exactly what you mean."

He stood up swiftly and took Joker's elbow, guiding him towards his own bedroom and sitting him down on the edge of the bed. "And of course you can have bubbles." He gave a tiny smile and opened the drawer where Ollie kept her bath products and selected one more or less at random. It was pink, but he didn't think Joker would mind.

He made his way to the bathroom, picking up a clean towel on the way and crumbled the bar under the running water, satisfied when a cloud of bubbles started to appear.

"OK, help yourself. You can leave your clothes here; I'll put them in the laundry. I'll find you something in the wardrobe, but my robe should do you for the moment."

He unhooked his dressing gown from the back of the door and laid it on the bed.

"Need anything else?"

[The Joker]

Joker allowed himself to be led into the bedroom and sank heavily onto the large bed. His exhaustion was finally starting to completely overwhelm him and it took several moments for anything Harvey said to register.

"My coat has to be dry cleaned." He said absently. "And my pockets have stuff in them. You should take them out first unless you want a knife through your washing machine."

He shook his head slowly. "'m okay." He stood up and shrugged off his coat. Joker had slipped the suspenders off of his shoulder when he shot a sly glance at Harvey. "You may want to scram if you don't want me to get any funny ideas. I may be sick but I can always-"

That damn cough! He clutched at his chest and squeezed his eyes shut. It hurt and made him feel weak. He hated feeling weak.

"I'm just gonna take a bath..." He grumbled once the fit had passed. "Maybe I'll drown and get rid of this stupid illness."

[Harvey Dent/Two-Face]

Harvey nodded. "I'll take care of your things, don't worry."

Although he knew Joker was in no state to answer, he couldn't help cross-examining him. A hangover from his days on the other side of the law, he supposed. "How did you let yourself get in this state? And what the hell have Harley and the others been playing at? I know that there's nobody in Arkham whose elevator goes completely to the top, but to let you get in this state - honestly, I could throttle the lot of them."

He gave another very small smile and ostentatiously turned his back to let Joker undress unwatched. "Joker, your virtue is safe with me unless you've suddenly grown breasts."

He stopped on his way out of the room, turning his head slightly and speaking over his shoulder. "Please don't drown. I'm going to try and persuade Two-Face to clear his bedroom out for you, and if you're dead I'll have gone through a very painful argument for nothing."

[The Joker]

Joker groaned and put his head in his hands. "I don't know, Harvey. Don't use that tone, it makes my head want to explode."

He was pulling his socks off when Harvey said he would try to get Two-Face to clear out his room. "Don't bother." He said, stumbling slightly as one sock was particularly stubborn. "Your bed looks comfy and I've decided I want to sleep in it. Pretty please? Tartlette can join me if she wants, so I won't be any trouble at all!"

Once he was satisfied with his nakedness, he grabbed Harvey's robe and went into the bathroom. His eyes lit up at the bubbles. "Oh, Harv, you do know how to woo me." He called out through the now closed bathroom door.

Joker dropped the robe unceremoniously onto the floor and then slipped into the tub. He sighed happily as the warm water and sparkly bubbles washed over his skin. "Oh, perfect."

[Harvey Dent/Two-Face]

"No, Joker. She can't. But if you honestly think you can try to persuade her and live through it, be my guest. And anyway, Two-Face's bed is perfectly comfortable." He muttered under his breath: "It should be, he spends enough time in it."

Harvey gathered up Joker's clothes and carried them to the utility room, though he doubted they would ever get properly clean without industrial-strength chemicals. He placed the knives in a box, planning to clean them later, and covered the coat with a dry-cleaning suit bag. The only other objects in his pockets were a few banknotes and a scrap of paper covered cloely in indecipherable drawings and notes. He presumed it made some sort of sense to Joker so he put it with the knives.

A few minutes later, when he heard merry splashes and the occasional quiet giggle, he took a deep breath, closed his eyes and sat down to talk to Two-Face.

~Well, isn't this cosy, Harv? We can have a pyjama party. Him and me and you and Olivia. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING?~
~I thought you loved him.~
~I do. But I still don't want him within a mile of me unless he's about to fu-~
~ Alright, I get the picture.~
~I'm going in to talk to him. Don't try to stop me.~
~Is that really a good idea?~
~Probably not. Never stopped me in the past though.

Over Harvey's protests, Two-Face pushed into the front of Harvey's head and stalked to the bathroom, flinging open the door.

[The Joker]

The smeared make-up had been removed and the dirt had been washed from his hair. Though Joker still felt like a truck (a Bat-Truck) had hit him in the chest, he was feeling better. Apparently good hygiene helped your health.

He'd been cheerfully making a sparkly bubble beard when the door flung open. "Face! I was hoping you'd come out. Want to join me? I don't think my plague is spreadable through water. Is that how you'd say it? Maybe contagious would be better...I don't know."

He coughed and then sunk down a little further into the hot bathwater. "These are fun bubbles."

[Harvey Dent/Two-Face]

Two-Face stood in the doorway. Sometimes he wondered exactly what he had ever seen in Joker. Sparkly pink bubbles. How could he have fallen in love with anyone who enjoyed sparkly pink bubbles?

"You're feeling better, Joker? Good." He stepped forwards and trailed a hand through the warm water. "Because it' going to make it a lot more enjoyable to do this."

Without warning he grabbed a handful of Joker's hair and forced his head under the water.

"What the hell are you doing to us, Joker?" His voice rose to a roar as he fought to keep Joker's head submerged. "You dump me, you try to kill me, then you kiss me like we never broke up, then you walk out again and now here you are in our goddamned bathroom. What the fuck?"

[Olivia Hale]

Olivia was sick of the cold and sick of Gotham. The icy wind cut through even her heaviest jacket and froze her to the core in the short time it took her to walk from the bookstore to the car.

It had been particularly slow day at work. Olivia had had plenty of time during the day to replay her conversation with Bruce over and over. They hadn't really resolved anything and it had sort of made matters worse. She rubbed the back of her neck to fight a growing tension headache.

Olivia thanked the driver as she exited the car and made her way up to the apartment. She could hear Two-Face shouting before she even opened the door.

Olivia tossed her purse down and quickly followed his voice. Her eyes widened as she saw him apparently drowning someone in the bathtub. "What the hell are you doing?" She shouted, rushing forward to grab his arms in an attempt to pull him away. "Let them go! Are you crazy?"